Sunday, March 21, 2010

The House That Friends Built (Under Construction... again!)

Do not be dismayed at goodbyes. A farewell is necessary before we can meet again. And, meeting again, after moments or lifetimes, is certain for those we call friends. ~ Richard Bach

Feeling a bit homesick today, hence this post...

I can't say I have ever had trouble making new friends. Fortunately for me, the friends I had as a girl are still some of my most treasured relationships - they have become so familiar to me that our memories of the past have bled into one another over time, and when telling a story, you can never be sure if you were actually there, or, you just think you were because you have laughed and/or cried over those memories together so many times. So, in terms of friendships, these women are my foundation... my first, and the ones that can bear the heaviest loads.

My years in Halifax afforded me the opportunity to meet more strange and wonderful people to add to my 'house of friends'. Mostly women (& a few lucky men), they saw me through thick and thin as I changed careers, apartments, hair cuts, relationships and so on. My first floor.

Moving to Texas brought a new & unexpected challenge, however. For the first time, I didn't know anyone but my husband. Not one soul. Poor, poor Colin. Suddenly Colin was my lone friend, which meant I was surprisingly hurt when he was reluctant at my suggestion to go for a pedicure or go shopping for a new shower curtain.

It took time (during which, Colin was the best friend a girl could have - thank you, love), but I did make some more-than-fabulous friends. Neighbours, coworkers, classmates, fitness class participants - you name it. I found some real keepers in the most unlikely places.
Leaving Texas after four years felt like leaving Canada all over again - more tears than I would like...but what a great statement to type when you think about it! Lucky me, really.

To make a long story short, here I am again. Ahh, the life of a travelling engineer's wife. No friends (at least those that are immediately tangible) to speak of. Colin is my one man band once more. Lucky him. Which leads me to my point...Ella and I went for a morning visit to a neighbours house this morning. This new neighbour also has a sweet little girl, ten days younger than Ella. Our visit was really nice - talk of babies, husbands, travel, and missing home came easy for both of us. A great way to spend a few Sunday morning hours. Yay!

Here's the thing - as I walked back home with a sleepy Ella, a warm breeze blowing on my face and sun shining down on me, I got completely and totally sad. Sad! Like tears stinging the eyeballs sad. The trouble? Well, not only do I now miss Nova Scotia and everyone in it, I also thoroughly miss Texas and my 'peeps' there. A killer dose of double home sickness washed over me. DOUBLE home sickness. Yuck.

I promise to get over it. Hopefully soon. But, is there ever a time when those unexpected floods of emotion stop sneaking up on you? I am guessing no.

It's now evening here, and I am going to shake off my pouty face and go search for a car with my BFF. I should have wheels again by the end of the week. Thank God. (Not like I feel like braving the madness of the roads, but I know I must.)
So, dear friends in other countries, know I thought of each and every one of you today while I sulked about my far-away-ed-ness. The pain is slightly eased by Vonage, Skype, Blackberry, and email, thank goodness. Gotta love technology.